The last laugh
by the-prophet-of-sin
Summary: AU,the Joker and the Bat have their last battle, the Joker is crippled and forced to retire his life of crime and is placed into Arkham asylum. but Gotham has not seen the last of his presence in the city, because he has one last joke to tell and the punchline is about Harley and his heirs. this story might become a Yuri, Pamela/OFC. some characters will be a little OOC


**A/N: **I am starting yet another story; hey you can't blame a crazed genius for getting bored. Anyway I decided that most of Batman's and Joker's battles are unrealistic, neither one of them ever dies or gets seriously hurt. So this story is about when one of them does. This story will contain OCs and maybe a few OOC, elements of the comic books may appear.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any DC characters, or marvel characters depending if I decide to mix them. All OCs and the plot story are completely mine and original. Please do not use them without asking me. If you do a hellhound will find you and eat your soul.

Chapter 1

On top of Gotham Bridge the helicopters hovered around one particular arch. Their searchlights focused on two figures, the notorious Batman, and the infamous Joker. The hero laid on his stomach, gripping on two the villain dangling above the dark waters that marked the end of the long drop if someone were to fall. Despite the Joker's misdeeds the Bat could not decide the villain's fate that was with the laws hands. All the hero could do was to deliver him to it, the Bat looked down at the Joker, no fear of what was to come if his nemesis were to let go of his hand was evident. His face had the seamed crazed look it always had.

"Hey Bat's, pretty high up now aren't we?" the crime clown said before bursting into hysterical laughter.

"Not for long, after I pull you up your going back to the asylum were you belong" the vigilantly said right back at him in the usual deep harsh voice.

"Well I don't much like the sound of that, doesn't sound like too much fun"

"Doesn't matter, look around you. There's no way out of this one" Batman said slowly pulling up the Joker.

"Not so fast Bats, I still got one trick up my sleeve" the Joker twirled his finger in the air before pressing a button on his purple tux, spitting acid from the flower placed on it. It would have hit the Bats face if by instinct he didn't put his arm in the way. As the armor corroded from the acidic liquid the Joker released the bats hand. But before he could fall the hero attempted to grab onto the other hand but was shocked by one of the Jokers lethal hand buzzers. As the Bat recoiled from the shock, the Joker started to plummet to the waters below. Time seemed to slow down as the people on the bridge watched the crime lord fall; an insane laughter filled the air before a splash of water silenced it. Civilians and the Jokers own gang members stood in shock, the same thought gathered in everyone's mind, _is the crime clown really dead?_ What fallowed next was the clowns that served under the Joker running in a panicked, the officers there were detaining any criminal they could. In the panicked the vigilantly escaped, avoiding police, news reporters and regular fans from asking him questions.

(A few hours later)

In the crime clowns not so secret anymore hideout, due to some of the Jokers so-called loyal members squealing to the police, sat a beaten Joker with a smoking gun in his hands and a dead man in a lab coat bleeding on the floor. Harley rushes to him with tears smudging her make-up, x-rays were done showing an image of the Joker's severely injured lower spine, making it obvious to even a child that he would never walk again without some kind of support. The Joker seethed in anger as he tightly gripped the gun in his hand, but then he thought of something. A plan long forgotten by the purple suited clown, Harley looked at him confused when he burst into maniacal laughter.

"what are ya' laughing about Mista' J?" she said slightly tilting her head to the left

The clown gave Harley a crazed smile, "Harley, go underneath my desk and get my suit case". Harley did as she was ordered and went to get the case, it wasn't well hidden but then again who in their right mind besides the Bat would want to mess with the Jokers stuff. "Excellent! Now Harley, listen carefully. You are to leave here and go somewhere safe, then and only the do you open up this case".

After a few moments of Harley hesitating she finally gave in and stood up, she looked back at the clown and gave him a kiss on the cheek, "see ya later Mista' J" she said as she jumped out the window suitcase in hand.

Soon after a large bang came from the front door, after a few more the door caved on and burst open allowing a swarm of SWAT team members to go in looking for any of the Jokers former gang members. Leading the team fully decked in SWAT armor stood Detective Renee Montoya. Her black hair tied loosely in a ponytail that slightly swayed in the wind as she looked around the haunted house of the abandon amusement park the Joker called home. She then led her team further into the house before stopping them, "alright well be splitting into two teams of ten from here on out. Team A and I will be taking the east wing and team B will take the west. I want status reports every 15 minutes, if I don't call you then you call me got it" some of the more macho men groaned at the thought of being ordered around by a woman but nodded non-the-less. As the team split after checking their weapons and turning off their safety, they began to search the eerie hunted house. A little less than 15 minutes passed and the _Walkie__-__talkie sounded off letting Renee know that team B was trying to call her. Some of the younger members jumped at the sound and nearly fired holes into the wall, as the others laughed Renee sighed in frustration as she went to listen to the report. "What's your current status? Over"_

_"We found some kind of make-shift hospital room with someone inside, we can't tell who it is but we are preparing to disarm and detain the threat, over" _

_"Alright, after you detain the threat stay put and well regroup shortly, over" _

_"roger that, over and out" was the final thing the leader of team B said before the transmission was turned off as the Renee's team regrouped with the other she was met with an odd sight. There strapped down to a gurney, was the Joker, the man who until a just now she believed no! Hoped was dead. And now there he was laughing at the top of his lungs as the SWAT members stood around him. She quickly regained her posture and called into headquarters to tell them what they found._

_(A few months later)_

_Immediately after the Joker was captured he was taken first to the hospital, there it was pointed out that the Jokers spine from the waist down was near destroyed and he would never walk again. After the hospital fixed him up he was rushed out to court to be tried for his crimes, despite many people's protest he pleaded insanity which no one could deny. The judge declared that the Joker be placed in Arkham Asylum until he was considered well enough to be tried. At first everyone in Arkham was on edge, constantly taking extra precautions when dealing with the Joker. But he never seemed to do anything besides to mess around, from doing wheelies on his wheelchair or racing down the hallways. Eventually people began to drop their guard around him completely; their excuses were "besides him being crazy he really is quite decent". Eventually he got a call from an unknown source when he picked it up he smiled wide._

_"Hello there" the Joker said, he reveled in the fact that no one was even tapping his phone calls. They all trusted him too much for that. "did you take the cakes out the oven like I asked?" to anyone else besides an evil mastermind this would of sounded like one of the Jokers crazed conversations with some random person. But this was much more than that._

_"of course Mista' J" said a woman's voice over the phone, "in fact their cooling right now"_

_The clown slightly chuckled "good, good make sure that they are properly prepared for the opening ceremony" _

_"you got it Puddin" she said right before she hung up, the clown was so pleased with how well his plan was going that he didn't even care that Harley had called him that yet again_

_(Underground lab)_

_Harley hung up the phone and sighed; "I miss my Puddin" she slowly turned around while two scientists worked franticly on computers. She looked up at the two large glass tubes, in side were two young adults. Both were the Jokers children, only because his DNA was combined with theirs. The Joker paid a lot of money for his two children to be created; they were a combination of the Joker and two meta-humans. The clown wanted to see if he could make his own super villains instead of relying on henchmen to do his work. "So who are the other people mixed in with my Puddin's kids, wouldn't want them knocking on my door expecting anything"._

_"Huh oh, the volunteers. Don't worry about them; they were just some random meta-humans that the Joker handpicked". "Alright then" Harley said satisfied with their answer, she looked at the young male. He looked like a younger version of the Joker with longer green hair, due to the scientist machines constantly stimulating the subject's muscles as to avoid atrophy. The male was well toned but not so much as to cause is body to be over-built, then Harley looked to her left and saw the female. Obviously she got more DNA from the other volunteers then the male did. While her hair was green, it was a darker green and almost looked black. Her skin was pale but instead of being chalk white like the other subject, hers had a slight tint to it making her look almost normal._

_"Hey doc when can they come out" Harley asked, desperately wanting to meet her Puddin's kids._

_"almost ready" one of the doctors said, he was middle aged with black gelled back hair, he type one final code in and then a red flashing came on with the sounds of pressure being released. "All right then, now before anything I want to brief you on what exactly you're getting into" the scientist said grabbing his clip board. "these are the notes we collected on Des" he said pointing at the male in the tube, "he seems to be able to generate his own magnetic fields, he's very stoic when talking to him, and he doesn't seem to care about any situation. Miles! Tell her about the other one" the black haired scientist shouted to the younger scientist, he had blonde messed up hair and he looked like he just came back from a panic attack._

_He jumped as he scrambled around for his clip bored, "Mimic, an electro-kinetic. Rarely ever talks, she able to run faster than others due to the electric charges her cells emits, even though she can create he own electricity she usually just absorbs it from somewhere else". The scientist jumped at the sound grates in the tube grinding against metal._

_A drain at the bottom of each tube opened up, allowing the water to escape and slowly lowered the suspended subjects. Both scientists went over to the male to disconnect all the tubes and the oxygen mask from him. Harley walked over to the girl and did the same thing but in a more motherly fashion. After a few moments the girl's eyes opened up. Harley brushed they girls wet hair out of her eyes and smiled, "good morning sweet heart" Harley said to the green haired girl. The girl looked around in a daze as Harley slowly sat her up. The two scientists backed away from the now very conscious male in front of them._

_"Hello again Des, how was your sleep" the more nervous of the scientist said, _

_"Terrible" the junior Joker said, he looked to the blonde haired woman and frowned. "Who the hell are you and why are you touching my sister?" the green haired man asked_

_"Hi-ya there, I'm Mista J's number one lady" Harley said while lifting her index finger out._

_"Mista J?" the green haired man said with a confused look._

_"The Joker" the more self-assured scientist said_

_"y-y-your father" the other stuttered out_

_"I see so does that mean that you're here to take us to him"_

_"Not exactly" the clown girl said, "it's a long story"_

_(An hour later)_

Des sat with his legs folded into each other as he took in everything Harley just told him about. Harley sat with girl sitting in her lap, giggling as she played with her green hair.

Des raised his head and stared at the blonde woman, "if the Joker is now in the asylum then why would he have you get us?"

"Because JJ, you two are his last jokes to the world. Can you imagine what their faces would look like when they get a load of us", Harley hugged the girl in front of her tightly.

"Well then let's go" Des said walking over to a metal cabinet and pulling out a clothes. "Mimic let's get dressed" Harley stared at them in confusion as Des dressed in a black trench coat with deep purple lines, a light purple shirt, a violet scarf and finally dark purple pants and shoes. Mimic on the other hand dressed a little more lightly. She put on a black top with a diamond of skin showing right between her breast and violet lines going along the tattered ends of it, black skin tight pants with violet diamond patterns and black boots with purple stripes.

"And where are you to going?" Harley asked sounding more like a mother then the insane villain she was.

"Where going to start completing Jokers goals" Des said in a deadpan tone.

"You can't just rush into it" Harley said shaking her head, "Mista J wants us to rebuild his empire and reclaim his throne as the clown prince of crime".

"Then what would you suggest our first course of action be?" Des said obviously not caring.

"First we need to get a place" Harley said grinning in delight as she thought of a place that she wanted.

(About an hour later)

Poison Ivy sat down at the bar of the night club she was in, she sighed as she stirred her drink. She knew that as soon as she sat down she became the focus of most of the men's eyes. They starred at her with lust, looking up and down her figure focusing at certain key points. Obviously they appreciated the way her green blouse clung to her pale skin and how her dark blue skinny-jeans complemented her rear. If they had any idea that the woman they were violating in their minds was the nature loving psychopath known as poison ivy they would've of ran, even though she hated the people and the noise she went to get information about any new objects of value she would like to steal to continue founding her research on her beloved flora, because despite its appearance, club Secret was a well known place where people gathered and traded information if you paid the right price that is. She noticed a dark haired woman occasionally look at her curiously across the bar,_ obviously a cop,_ the woman thought to herself. It wasn't hard to sneak in here but even when they did they rarely found anything that could incriminate anyone on the higher end of the crime hierarchy. Ivy was surprised that the police ever caught the Joker alive and him just not escaping, almost all of the crime lords of Gotham were glad that the Joker was finally gone for good. Because it was well known that there weren't a lot of people that would loved to put a bullet right into the clown's skull.

The only reason they didn't kill him long ago because the Joker mad ties to all of them, including Ivy. While she hates to admit it, because of Harley being her best friend it always stopped Ivy from killing him. When the crime world found out he was not only incarcerated but crippled as well, there were celebrations held, it even got to the extent that the Penguin set up a party celebrating it. But unlike most of the other acclaimed super villains Ivy wasn't so sure that the Joker was gone for good, because of all the years that she had known and occasionally team up with the insane clown. He would always win in some way; let it be destroying whole sections of Gotham, or just pissing the Batman off. When the police actually cleaned out the Joker's former hideout, they found multiple stolen items of high value from around the world that the Batman didn't even know about. She was absolutely sure that somewhere in the near future the Joker would prove to everyone that you can't get rid of him that easy. Thinking of the clown made her think of his sidekick as well; Ivy hadn't seen Harley since about a week after the Joker was incarcerated. She spent the night at her hideout and then left in the morning. Ivy sighed again, despite knowing that the clown girl could take care of herself. With the Joker in Arkham there was no one to protect her from the authorities.

The front door to the club was opened then closed; Ivy didn't show any signs of caring until she heard a woman's laughter. Ivy's head snapped to the front door and stared at the woman she was just thinking about.

Harley walked into the night club with a her two newly found children right behind her, she made sure that her group made a good impression on the crime world that know thought the Joker was in fact a bad joke. She dressed herself in a strapless top that was red on one side and black on the other, her pants were the same way except the colors switched sides. She wore two elbow long gloves, one red one black and earrings the shape of cards. The shorter girl next to her clothes looked slightly similar in color but instead of the top that Harley wore, she was wearing a corset styled top, black pants with red diamonds running down the sides and black heeled boots with aces acting as a buckle for the straps, Des wore a dark purple button up shirt with most of them undone exposing more of his chalk white skin then her would like, he put his hands into the pockets of his black pants and sighed.

"Harley, why are dressed like this?" he asked

"Because JJ, we have to make a good first impression" Harley said giving him a big smile.

They walked up to one of the security guard, the man was massive with a tight black shirt with white words that said security on it, his neck was covered in golden chains and his bald head gleamed making it looked like it was polished. _He looks like the white version of Mr. T,_ Harley thought as she girlishly giggled. "Hey there" Harley said to the brute in front of her

"What do you want?" he said back in a threatening tone

"My group and I would like to see your boss" Harley said with confidence

The man stood there with a blank face before laughing, his deep chuckled slightly lightened the mood letting the people around them relaxes a little. "That's funny, you can leave now" the man said wiping tears from his eyes.

"I don't think you heard me, I want to talk to your boss" Harley said pouting.

"Look here, if you don't leave now I might have to put a bullet in that pretty little face of yours" the man said reaching behind him. A red haired woman at the bar stood up suddenly and was about to do something before the man made a strangled sound and was lifted into the air. The gold chains he wore were now pressed tightly against his skin; by some invisible forced the chains tighten as the brute tried to pry them off of him.

"You know, I don't much like people threatening members of my family" Des said walking up to the man floating in the air, "now you'll take us to your boss right?" Des asked already knowing the answer; the man floating in the air nodded his head. The chains around his neck loosened and the brute collapsed to the floor gasping for breath, when he recovered he reached around his back and pulled out a M1911 pistol and aimed it at the green haired man.

"DIE FREAK!" he shouted as he pulled the trigger, as the sound echoed across the room people closed their eyes and expected the target to yell in pain and drop onto the ground. When they heard nothing a few of them opened their eyes and gasped in shock at what they saw. The bullet floated just inches away from Des's opened palm. He scowled in disgust as the bullet dropped to the ground and lifted the man by the chains on his neck.

"Your lucky that Harley intends to claim this establishment as our new base or else I'd paint the walls red with your blood" Des said as he tightened his invisible grip, he scoffed as he threw the man through a tinted window.

Harley walked to another of the security guards and asked him the same question, the slightly smaller man looked towards the window wear his coworker just flew through and gave a frightened smile as he nodded. As he was leading the way Harley noticed her red haired friend sitting at the bar, "hi Pam!" Harley shouted as she waved. The red haired woman waved back slowly still surprised at the scene she just witnessed. The man led the three people up the stairs and through the door that led into a large with a man sitting at his desk with a few others, there was cocaine on the desk and it reeked of marijuana.

The man looked at who just entered and sneered, "What the fuck are they doing here?" the man said pointing at Harley. "V.I.P's only, now get the fuck out" he said waving them off

"I don't think so" Harley said slamming her hands down on the table, "you see I really like this place, so much I decided that I want it. So here's the deal, sign this place over to me and you get to live" she said with a wicked smile on her face.

The man starred at Harley with a frown and turned to one of the two burley body guards "take care of them" the massive man nodded and reached towards Harley, but before he could touch her, he felt a rush of electricity run through his body causing it to convulse. Mimic looked down at him observing the effects of her touching him and sending the same amount of volts a taser would give.

Harley looked at the now fallen man and smiled even wider, "now let's try that again" the man sat up on his chair and pulled out a gun. Before he could fire Des crushed the metal and tossed it aside, Harley was growing impatient and grabbed the man by the collar. "We can make this deal with or without you now choose what you want to do".

The man scrabbled away as Harley when she let go of him, "I rather die first" he said trying to sound tougher then he was.

"well you heard the man" Harley said smiling, "let's give him what he wants" the man was then pinned to the wall by the jewelry on his wrist, Mimic walked to the table and poured on of the glasses contents onto her hand. She walked towards the man and silenced his endless rant of profanities by placing her hand on his face. As electricity flowed through her hand into the man's body his employees watched in horror, his body convulsed and his skin started to fry as steam and the smell of flesh burning started to fill the room. Mimic let go of the man when the screaming stopped, Harley turned around with a smile. "Alright is there anyone who still opposes to this takeover?" she asked as expected none of them said anything, "alright then your first job is to dispose of the body" Harley said sitting down on the in the dead man's chair her children sitting beside her, "this establishment is now officially under new management.

**A/N:** alright there's the first chapter, and to clarify things that people may be confused on. Des and Mimic are test tube babies and were created using the Joker's and Meta-humans that the Joker handpicked DNA. I may make this a Yuri but I haven't actually decided what the paring would be, but if it becomes a Yuri (and it has a high chance that it will) one of the pairings will of course be Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn, but that won't be the main paring, any way review this tell me what you think and give me things I can improve or ideas.


End file.
